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Gaming Records


This issue's gaming record is for the most incompetent filling in of a character sheet.

I don't know the full name of the person concerned. I just know his first name, Roy, which is probably good, because I don't want to humiliate him, just lightly toast him a bit. (If I gave you his full name, two seconds later half of you would be tapping it into AltaVista or Google. I know I would.).

So how do I know him?

Well, I recently started a superhero campaign, using Golden Heroes as the rules system - with the D20 skills system grafted on, but that's a different story. Now most of you (especially those outside the UK) have probably never heard of Golden Heroes, but all you need to know is that it was a British superhero game, published in the mid-eighties by Games Workshop* and out of print ever since.

I figured it would be handy to have a second copy of the rulebooks, for players to look at during play or take home to study. So when I was at Gencon, I looked around the various merchandising stands in search of a second-hand copy, and on one stand I found one.

Which is where Roy comes in.

The gamesmasters guide was a bit battered, and the players handbook was missing the cover, but I negotiated a price, and happily purchased. And happily browsed. Until I got to the page which contained the blank character sheet (i.e. the master) for you to photocopy.

It is here we come to Roy's prick factor one.

He'd filled it in. The master. He'd filled in the actual master. Prick.

And then we come to prick factor two.

He'd filled it in badly.

He'd created a character called merely... Mathew Foggerty. No alias. Perhaps he was the superhero with no name. And then we come to one of the powers that he had: Weapon Skill.

Or "weopon skill" as he'd chosen to call it. (Or perhaps it was a custom power he'd invented involving the ability to piss upon sleeping drunkards lying in the gutter... perhaps that was Mathew Foggerty's mission in life - to rid the world of homeless winos).

Now Roy, if you're reading this, you made a couple of mistakes in the way you did your weapon skill.

1) Weapon skill grade three does not give you the ability to use three weapons, it gives you the ability to use one weapon really well.

2) There is no such weapon as an "Uzzi". There is a rather famous submachine-gun called the "Uzi". Perhaps this is what you were thinking of.

3) You chose as your weapons of choice: ".45 Revolver", "Uzzi" and "Dagger". Here I quote from the Golden Heroes Supervisors Book:

"Special notes on weapons: Any weapon chosen by a superpowered character should be in keeping with the spirit of comic-book characters. Superheroes and supervillains do not usually run around armed with machine-guns or bazookas."

So Roy, if you're reading this, I suggest you find a photocopier and learn to read the rules.

And if any of you other guys are interested in Golden Heroes, a freeware version of the rules is available at:

* I could have made that a hyperlink to their web site, but since they stopped publishing roleplaying games about fifteen years ago I don't see why I should. Not that I'm in any way bitter you understand.

What do you think of this article?

It ascended to heaven and walked with the gods.
It was very good.
It was pretty good.
It was okay.
It was a bit bad.
It was very bad.
It sucked, really, really badly.